August 12, 2009 0 comments Articles & Reviews, By Jonathan Cristaldi

The Noble Rot (event): Chardonnay $#!@ Storm

chard.shitstorm2

It was indeed, a noble rot this Tuesday last in the year of this the two-thousands and some nine. Chardonnay with its golden hew and hubris never humbled by my loud and incessant whaling, and I don’t mean Moby D! It was joyously a $#!@ storm. Listen: We tasted six different Chardonnays:

  1. Parigot & Ruchard NV Blanc de Blancs | Sparkling | CRS Rating: 6,788,450,320
  2. Shoofly 2007 Chardonnay ‘Chook Raffle’ | Steel aged new world | CRS Rating: 9,567,450
  3. Gilbert Picq 2008 Chablis | Simple French | CRS Rating: 734
  4. Boccata 2007 Chardonnay | American dry | CRS Rating: -13
  5. David Ramey 2006 Chardonnay ‘Hyde Vineyard’ | American refined | CRS Rating: 10,345,657,112,390,476
  6. Mar Colin 2005 Chassagne-Montrachet ‘Encignieres’ | French refined CRS Rating: 89,994,936,945,900,995,333,234,009,002,884

Jesse Warner-Levine of New York Vintners poured with a mighty vibrato while arousing total enthusiasm for the wines served, and offered subtle but subjective insight into selecting wines “on your own.” I read the Great Gatsby start to finish and gave a lesson in blending wine. I found an open bottle of red under a kitchen sink and with the Chablis of the evening, blended in a marvelously stainless steel blender, my own Grand Cru. No one but Jesse would try it with me, and we both found the nose to be moldy and unsanitary while I found some fresh cut grass.

I am a firm believer that most who, until last evening shunned Chardonnay, now are willing to embrace its succulent, sometimes subtle sometimes boisterous bouquet of caramels, hazelnuts, asparagus, fresh churned butter, and all the colors under the rainbow. The delights of the evening were the Parigot, the Ramey, and the Encignieres. I however preferred the flask of whisky, tucked casually into my inside jacket pocket.

We did falter however in not discussing Malolactic Fermentation, and that is Brian Quinn’s fault, I’m sure.

Malolactic fermentation tends to create a rounder, fuller mouthfeel. It has been said that malic acid tastes of green apples – indeed, malic comes from the Latin word for apple (mālum) and is present in apple juice – and this can be tasted in the wine. By contrast, lactic acid is richer, even unctuous, and more buttery tasting – corresponding to its presence in milk, as reflected in the word lactic being derived from the Latin word for milk (lac), and it is present in sour milk. To read more about MF, check out the Wikipedia Entry cuz it’s not half bad, but don’t trust everything Mr. Wiki tells you.

Blues/alt-country singer/guitarist, Osei Essed & Will Orzo of THE WOES jammed the winos into stringy accordianopic heaven.

Please enjoy these tasty pictures below where you’ll see the ABC-crowd-mentality slip quietly into the darkness of the night.

Jonny8-11

Jonny Cigar | Master of Ceremonies

Winos

Winos

More Winos

More Winos

Osei & Will (of the WOES)

Osei & Will (of the WOES)

Fancy

Fancy

Jesse Warner-Levine - Talking To France

Jesse Warner-Levine – Talking To France

Brian Quinn and A Lovely Lady in Red

Brian Quinn and A Lovely Lady in Red

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